• Carmakazi@lemmy.world
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    3 days ago

    This is probably one of my bad takes, but here goes.

    I imagine for some people at least, saying “I’m asexual” is easier than saying “I’ve been subjected to some sort of sexual trauma that makes the idea of being sexually involved with anyone incredibly painful and therefore I have no interest.”

    But I guess someone can come to have no sex drive without trauma? But that’s hard for me to wrap my head around too, like someone who doesn’t enjoy food, or music.

    • joby@programming.dev
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      3 days ago

      Ace here: I have plenty of sex drive, but am not attracted to anyone. I didn’t come up with it, but a good analogy is feeling like eating, but you open the fridge and nothing in particular is calling to you.

      If you are (or can imagine being) straight or gay, or even just have “a type”… There are people you don’t feel inclined to fuck. For me, that set of people is everyone I’ve met so far. I’ve been in relationships, albeit rarely, but it’s always been when the other person showed a lot of interest to get things started.

      There are also people who feel like sex is gross, and not all of them have trauma in their history.