Feels to me like a very normal thing to share with people I’m very close with, just sorta sharing life updates and chatting (“I’m looking for a job”, but weightier). But yeah would be really weird outside of that.
But also, no argument about the cliche lol. The one area of human sexuality the US is apparently less prudish about - specifically intending to make babies!
ITT, lots of people with sex hangups and anti-natalist obsessions trying to rationalize being so alone and hung-up that other adults talking about their plans in life makes them feel uncomfortable.
Certainly some strong opinions and even hostility from some folks, but for myself I don’t find it very fruitful to minimize the suffering caused by isolation the way you’ve done.
It’s a big deal to experience, it’s a chronic thing many find hard or impossible to escape (whatever your opinions on the reasons for that), and I think it’s pretty gross bordering on cruel to dunk on folks that might be experiencing something so painful.
Speaking as a neurodivergent person, this is stupid. This is really stupid.
I am fine with being labeled as “cruel” if it makes you want to work harder to expand your capability to socialize and exercise your brain muscles to put yourself in uncomfortable situations.
If being around healthy couples is triggering to you, that’s massively on you and your responsibility to manage.
This is what a therapist would tell you to do, this is something you can do, and this is something you need to do. Society will not adjust to your unique problems, I am very thoroughly experienced in this hard fact of life. The world will be far, FAR more cruel to you than people on the internet telling you indirectly get your shit together.
So, I can’t decide if you’re directing this at me or just phrasing things unclearly. I’m not in the demographic you’re talking about, at all, never really have been.
I’m expressing sympathy for people who are lonely and who don’t want to be, because the way you phrased your previous set of complaints sounded, among other things, like you mocking people experiencing that. I get that people are being reactive jerks. It’s cuz they’re hurting. I’m not, so the things they are saying about it really don’t bother me (as you can see elsewhere in the thread).
The fact that you’re just doubling down, saying my POV is “stupid”, you’ve shown me all I need to see here. I’m not angry at you, I just think you have some gross views.
And btw, having neurodivergence(s) doesn’t just magically qualify you to speak for others.
And I’m not sure if you’re saying this is an affliction you suffer from or you’re going to bat for the people who do feel that way, and I don’t care. I’m consistent.
We can do a lot for people as individuals, and if someone came up to me in person and said they were struggling with being around me or anyone else because of my relationship or other things outside of their control, I would work to help them and help them fix that issue, I will not however adjust my behavior when it’s normal, harmless behavior. Fuck that. People need social consequence back, it’s a driving force to make people do the hard things instead of just retreat to their discord group of shut-ins who just feed one each other’s isolation and create a deep well of selfish behavior.
If you’re expecting someone to get cowed into tolerating anti-social behavior just because it’s some performative ideal that others wear like some kind of badge of supreme understanding, you won’t find it here, I am fucking more done than I’ve ever been tolerating people who don’t want to build connection and community.
I don’t care how lonely you feel you shouldn’t react to it in a way that drives others away, nor drives you away from others. Our responsibility to care for other people’s feelings ends where it starts to create social harm. It’s unhealthy for yourself and our society broadly and nurturing and tolerating a segment of our population who have sexual/social insecurity is literally how we’re in a place right now where armed nazis are patrolling the streets.
Once in a while you deeply need someone to tell you to get your shit together. I’m sorry our previous generation didn’t go a good job, but we have a responsibility now to be adults.
Feels to me like a very normal thing to share with people I’m very close with, just sorta sharing life updates and chatting (“I’m looking for a job”, but weightier). But yeah would be really weird outside of that.
But also, no argument about the cliche lol. The one area of human sexuality the US is apparently less prudish about - specifically intending to make babies!
ITT, lots of people with sex hangups and anti-natalist obsessions trying to rationalize being so alone and hung-up that other adults talking about their plans in life makes them feel uncomfortable.
deleted by creator
Certainly some strong opinions and even hostility from some folks, but for myself I don’t find it very fruitful to minimize the suffering caused by isolation the way you’ve done.
It’s a big deal to experience, it’s a chronic thing many find hard or impossible to escape (whatever your opinions on the reasons for that), and I think it’s pretty gross bordering on cruel to dunk on folks that might be experiencing something so painful.
Speaking as a neurodivergent person, this is stupid. This is really stupid.
I am fine with being labeled as “cruel” if it makes you want to work harder to expand your capability to socialize and exercise your brain muscles to put yourself in uncomfortable situations.
If being around healthy couples is triggering to you, that’s massively on you and your responsibility to manage.
This is what a therapist would tell you to do, this is something you can do, and this is something you need to do. Society will not adjust to your unique problems, I am very thoroughly experienced in this hard fact of life. The world will be far, FAR more cruel to you than people on the internet telling you indirectly get your shit together.
So, I can’t decide if you’re directing this at me or just phrasing things unclearly. I’m not in the demographic you’re talking about, at all, never really have been.
I’m expressing sympathy for people who are lonely and who don’t want to be, because the way you phrased your previous set of complaints sounded, among other things, like you mocking people experiencing that. I get that people are being reactive jerks. It’s cuz they’re hurting. I’m not, so the things they are saying about it really don’t bother me (as you can see elsewhere in the thread).
The fact that you’re just doubling down, saying my POV is “stupid”, you’ve shown me all I need to see here. I’m not angry at you, I just think you have some gross views.
And btw, having neurodivergence(s) doesn’t just magically qualify you to speak for others.
And I’m not sure if you’re saying this is an affliction you suffer from or you’re going to bat for the people who do feel that way, and I don’t care. I’m consistent.
We can do a lot for people as individuals, and if someone came up to me in person and said they were struggling with being around me or anyone else because of my relationship or other things outside of their control, I would work to help them and help them fix that issue, I will not however adjust my behavior when it’s normal, harmless behavior. Fuck that. People need social consequence back, it’s a driving force to make people do the hard things instead of just retreat to their discord group of shut-ins who just feed one each other’s isolation and create a deep well of selfish behavior.
If you’re expecting someone to get cowed into tolerating anti-social behavior just because it’s some performative ideal that others wear like some kind of badge of supreme understanding, you won’t find it here, I am fucking more done than I’ve ever been tolerating people who don’t want to build connection and community.
I don’t care how lonely you feel you shouldn’t react to it in a way that drives others away, nor drives you away from others. Our responsibility to care for other people’s feelings ends where it starts to create social harm. It’s unhealthy for yourself and our society broadly and nurturing and tolerating a segment of our population who have sexual/social insecurity is literally how we’re in a place right now where armed nazis are patrolling the streets.
Once in a while you deeply need someone to tell you to get your shit together. I’m sorry our previous generation didn’t go a good job, but we have a responsibility now to be adults.