It really is. I guess the silver lining is that hundreds of years of smoking might at least influence our natural selection such that the average person is slightly more resistant to wildfire smoke and acetylcholine agonists/ acetylcholinesterase inhibitors. Perhaps we’ve been training for the environmental disasters and chemical warfare that climate change may bring.
I got you an AI-generated karma bot propaganda poster. No need to thank me.
Count me in. Let’s have a “The Scarlet Letter II: Internet Boogaloo.”
When you’re done, look inside for coupons for other quality products from Croft Foods and Jenny-Ralph Mills among others. You could be enjoying the satisfying crunch of Let’s potato chips and washing it down with a nice, refreshing can of Cuke, all while impressing your significant other by being such a smart shopper and protecting the family budget.
Winstons?! That’s a baby’s cigarette! And I should know because our the parent company of Morleys, Philly Mortis, used to own the Croft Food company, which has a line of baby foods. Also most pediatricians prefer Morley Juniors for the little ones anyway.
On a side note, I’ve got to appreciate the level of detail in that ad. His lighter works by rubbing two sticks together. I will never not be delighted by the Flintstones’ anachronisms.
Thanks for keeping the kids safe with your 20mm autocannon. Also, props to you for selecting an air-transportable ride.
Don’t even get me started. If I have to wait in line behind that smug Karen, who thinks she’s so much better than me because she drives her kids around in her husband’s Lexus APC, I don’t know what I’ll do. Yeah, I drive a Toyota MRAP, Karen, so what? I’ll be the first to admit it’s not the most heavily armored vehicle, sure, but it’s efficient and reliable, and it keeps my kids safe from landmines on the way to daycare.
Thank you. I’ll see myself out.
Silver screen?
Morley Turkish Golds!
Thankfully, there aren’t any ads here. Just the thought of it stresses me out, and when I get stressed out, I reach for a Morley cigarette to keep my cool. The toasted tobacco and asbestos filter make for a smoother smoke, which soothes the throat. 9 out of 10 anti-ad, Fediverse, activists choose Morleys to keep up their pep and vigor in the fight against advertisement.
No need to reinvent the wheel. Just reach out to a furry community.
DOGE Plan to Push AI Across the US Federal Government is Wildly Dangerous.
Fixed that for you.
Dear originallucifer,
Thank you for bringing this to our attention. While we here at Misanthropes-R-Us take great pride in serving users with the most bitter and hostile experience possible, mistakes do happen. We sincerely apologize for the oversight and would like to make things right. Please accept the following platinum-tier diatribe as compensation:
"Okay originallucifer. Given your user name, inability to capitalize letters, and sporadic punctuation, I can’t tell if you’re an edgy teen, a semi-literate neckbeard, or a senile hippy whose grandchildren set up their account.
Oh, your fellow circle-jerkers patted you on the head when you gorged them with their favorite, trite, echo chamber fodder? What a shocker!
I bet you find electric lighting weird, too, you nonce.
Fuck off, eat shit and die, in that order so we can all finally rid ourselves of your spammy incompetence."
In conclusion, thank you for alerting us to our error, and we hope you are satisfied with your compensation.
Wishing you all the worst,
Misanthropes-R-Us
I’m glad to see something like this. I don’t have anything to contribute at the moment. I’m probably just mostly lurking this time.
Yeah, it was at least a resurgence of it after the revolt during the prohibition era.
It did initially, but keeping people awake for days turned out to be counterproductive as a standard procedure, so they dialed it back a lot.
Honestly, based on the results it had on the Eastern Front, I think Russians attempting the same would probably be a huge gift to Ukraine.
Morley and you! The smarter combination.