I’ve been in a similar situation. It seems it’s the only type of person I seem to attract. They pursue me, only when I eventually reciprocate they freak out, and self-sabotage ensues. In my case, the only thing was to walk away, because they were dragging me down with them. Some people can get past the trust issues (I have my own issues that I’ve been working through), but others can’t. So I don’t actually have any advice, sorry.