• Hadriscus@jlai.lu
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    2 hours ago

    Last year I got hit on by a young woman in my neighbourhood. She started by asking me for some rice because she didn’t have any left (that might have been an excuse). When I came back 5mn later with a bag, she simply asked me if I wanted to play with her. I told her I was married and went home, but I liked her approach. No room for ambiguity. She must have been 20 something, so it’s not a matter of age at least. Maybe maturity.

  • HugeNerd@lemmy.ca
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    5 hours ago

    Can I teleport an apostrophe into that possessive pronoun to transform it into the appropriate contraction?

  • burntbacon@discuss.tchncs.de
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    13 hours ago

    If it’s meant to be, they’ll speak up and say, “I’m interested in a date, what are you doing this friday?” or something along those lines, just like I would if I was interested in someone as a potential partner.

    Signs/signals/asstrology charts/ouija boards that mysteriously spell out words like kiss, sex, or date… these things are for middle school. I’ve got better things to do.

  • Hadriscus@jlai.lu
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    12 hours ago

    Fucks signs, fuck everything that’s not clear communication made of words that carry your intended meaning

    • bleistift2@sopuli.xyz
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      4 hours ago

      Could it be that “signs” are meant to hedge one’s bets? It doesn’t expose you as much if the other party isn’t interested.

      • socsa@piefed.social
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        57 minutes ago

        Right, just like it’s inappropriate for a guy to go up to a random woman, or even a familiar woman in a friendly setting and just say “hey you wanna fuck?” it’s also inappropriate in the other direction. That’s why you use an escalating series of verbal and non verbal cues to gauge interest first before you commit fully.

      • jjjalljs@ttrpg.network
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        3 hours ago

        Could be, but that’s immature and unattractive. You’re better off not throwing in with someone who’s unwilling to be vulnerable

        • chonglibloodsport@lemmy.world
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          28 minutes ago

          Right but the people who are mature, attractive, and clear and up front about their feelings tend not to stay single for very long.

  • Cyrus Draegur@lemmy.zip
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    14 hours ago

    No. Once bitten twice shy, and I got bitten over and over again. Falling in love with every person who was nice to me in high school was a massive mistake and caused nothing but hardship. The last two decades have been relatively peaceful because I don’t buy it anymore. Fuck reading between the lines, fuck hints, fuck signals and vibes. I’m never acting unless I receive DIRECT CLEARLY EXPRESSED FREELY GIVEN ENTHUSIASTIC CONSENT and not a moment sooner.

    I will never trust my ““intuition”” ever again.

    • ivanafterall ☑️@lemmy.world
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      13 minutes ago

      Last year I got hit on by a young woman in my neighbourhood. She started by asking me for some rice because she didn’t have any left (that might have been an excuse). When I came back 5mn later with a bag, she simply asked me if I wanted to play with her. I told her I was married and went home, but I liked her approach. No room for ambiguity. She must have been 20 something, so it’s not a matter of age at least. Maybe maturity.

    • sqgl@sh.itjust.works
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      5 hours ago

      Intuition does not help when it is a woman giving signs in order to reassure herself that she is attractive but with zero intention of accepting a request for a date.

  • Damage@feddit.it
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    16 hours ago

    Was one of the signs her saying something like “Hey, I’m attracted to you, would you like to explore a potential relationship?” ?

    Otherwise f off with “signs”

  • XM34@feddit.org
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    21 hours ago

    Meh, had this too often. The moment I make a move they usually withdraw. Nowadays I let people know that if they’re interested, hints won’t cut it. Either ask me out or stop that shit. I’ve had enough rejections to the point where I’d rather stay single than go through this hell again. ✌️

  • Pistcow@lemmy.world
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    1 day ago

    Goth girl i worked with at Tacobell in college, I guess, was flirting with me often? She gave me this burned CD, and her music was weird, so I just threw it in my binder. Years later, I finally listened to it, and it was all songs about having sex.

    I think she might have been interested in me?

  • kameecoding@lemmy.world
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    20 hours ago

    I have realized one day that years ago when she invited me in for a beer after a night out when I went to pickup my sunglasses that I left with her, it probably wasn’t about the beer, though to be fair to me, I thought she was still seeing this guy I knew so I basically had that part of my brain turned off around her.

    • insomniac_lemon@lemmy.cafe
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      20 hours ago

      Same. Not much around here in my travel range (not aware of anything social applicable to me), so the people who talk to me are definitely being cordial. Which is less awkward for me anyhow.

      I don’t leave the house (or talk to people) enough for the idea to seem anything other than silly.

      • peoplebeproblems@midwest.social
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        19 hours ago

        So funny thing you mention that. You’re describing me.

        For a very long time, I was in denial about being touched with the 'tism. Some behaviors of mine that I noticed I couldn’t ignored and asked some friends about them. Did some tests without thinking through my constant camouflage and yeah, definitely have ASD. I mentioned it to friends and family and they all said something similar to “you finally figured it out huh?” So hopefully I can start to gain more energy for going out as long as I don’t feel the need to camouflage. One thing at a time though.

        The other thing that doesn’t help is that I identify demiguy more than as a man. So I know my behavior and appearance doesn’t quite fit the “masculinity” picture - regardless if it’s toxic or not. Im definitely male, I’m definitely attracted to women, but like I like having soft hands. I’m a softer personality, I’d rather listen to gossip than think/pay attention/care about sports.

        Having discovered that though, maybe it too will help my confidence and lead to better interactions.

        I’m challenging myself to be this real me, and see if it leads to more signals.

        Still doesn’t help trying to find where people are.